The title of this post is debatable, but only if you want to hear me complain about how difficult it is to feed Hooper. Na, me neither. That’s why today I’m going to stick with picture proof and let you draw your own frustrating conclusions. The other day Hooper and I took a little trip over to Ikea to get some shelves for his new room. We grabbed food while we were there and this is what ensued:

Here we have proof that a few bites did actually enter the sanctuary known as Hooper’s chompers. That’s macaroni on his face and it’s always a good sign. See, it started well. 

Then he ditched the food for the straw wrapper. My hopes are still high, if only I could get that wrapper out of his mouth.

Then he started playing with his straw. He loves taking it out of the hole and putting it back in. I know, typical man, right? Get your mind out of the gutter, would you?

Ah-Ha! The fork is going in the right direction! Hip hip hoorays are starting to build in my throat.

Um, but that’s not a hopeful face. What is he doing? He loves mac n’ cheese.

Stall out move. Yes, he often licks his food when he’s unsure whether he wants to eat it. Hope is still bubbling, but impatience is also brewing. Eat Hooper, Eat!

Same bite remains on the fork. He’s thinking about it.

But instead, the fork makes a detour and the back end goes in. Hope begins to fizzle. My encouragement is going totally ignored. 

“Look Mom, no hands”. Look who thinks he’s so cool now. Yup, it’s the same little booger who won’t eat his god damn food.

Oh no he didn’t. Oldest trick in the book and he’s already figured it out at 18 months? The good ol’ hide your carrots in the napkin trick. Come on Hooper, I used to do that. You’re goin’ oldschool on me now.

And now the attention is turned to the napkin. He decides to cover his juice with it.

Then he eats the napkin. Seriously Hooper, you won’t eat your mac n’ cheese but you’ll eat the napkin. For goodness f’n sakes, you’re toying with me now aren’t you? 

He proceeds to rip his napkin into pieces. At this point I’ve given up all hope and am trying to find peace in the fact he is still sitting in his highchair past the usual 5 minutes. 

We leave to find his shelves. The food remains. And there lies cold hard evidence of an impossible child to feed. I have to conclude by saying that Ikea rocks. Hooper may have hardly touched his food, but kids eat free until 4pm, so three bucks stayed in my pocket. Score. Bummer it was wasted anyways.