Then & Now

I struggle with Christmas. It’s not so much of the hustle and bustle during a time that’s supposed to be relaxing, I can handle that; It’s the gift giving and consumerism part of it I have a hard time with. When it comes down to it, I don’t want to raise my children to be greedy little bitches. And shit, I don’t want all the praise going to some fake fat bearded guy when I was the one who worked hard to put Thomas the god damn train under the tree. Okay, I joke about the latter but I’m not joking about the greedy little bitches. The reality of it all is that family is the greatest gift of all. I know, because I was young and dumb, that muchkins or even teenagers for that matter can’t quite grasp the maturity that’s behind that statement. I’m wondering how to start instilling the gift of love and family early on. Willy and I have always been kinda scrougey during the holidays. We never celebrate Valentine’s Day. And it’s not because we don’t love each other. I love Willy with my entire heart. He’s my best friend. We’ve always felt Christmas and Valentine’s Day were centered around consumerism instead of actual love. So how do you replace the gifts with love?
Before we had kids, Willy and I would travel during Christmas time. It worked out best because it was the only time we would have off work or school. We spent one year in the Dominican Republic and another year in Nicaragua. It’s interesting to compare Christmas here to Christmas in countries where greed and consumerism hasn’t taken over. In the Dominican, there was one celebration and everyone in the town was there. They played music and danced, but there were no gifts. In fact, we were the only ones handing out baseball cards and little trinkets to the kids that we had brought from the states.
I’m wondering if we should start a family tradition of traveling for Christmas. Going through old pictures is watering a seed that has been sitting there for sometime. It sounds dreamy. And I’ve been itching to put a backpack on these rusty shoulders of mine. But I don’t want to ruin it either. What kid doesn’t have the fondest memories of waking up to find out Santa had been there the night before.
Your thoughts?
In any event, we had a nice Christmas. Hooper slept on our drive up to Santa Barbara (he’s such a trooper in the car) and Van greeted everyone with smiles and the occasional spit up. Hooper has yet to catch on to the whole present idea anyway so I figure we have another year to figure it all out. We didn’t buy the boys anything this year. Hooper had a good time opening his “prizes” from the advent calendar and he opened a few gifts from our very generous relatives. He woke up the morning after and went straight back to his cars anyhow. 

I can’t begin to tell you what these photos, these memories, do to my soul.
Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas.

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Bits + Pieces

Elf on the shelf // I love getting Christmas cards in the mail // Hoop rockin’ the Christmas jammies and sunglasses // We bought a little tree. Hooper like to sniff it. So do I // Reindeer Van // Hoop in his Christmas sweater // Been spinnin’ Christmas tunes all week // “Vanta”, part Van, part Santa // Cinnamon rolls? Yes, please // It’s been 30 to 40 degrees here in the morning. By California standards, this is freezing and we’re all complaining because that’s what we do // The boys had their pic taken with Santa. Hoop has his finger in his mouth and Van looks like Elmer Fudd, but whatever. We bought it anyway // Present wrapping. I need some elves to come help. If you know any, send em’ my way // Hoop and his beloved Mickey.
Happy Friday!

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A Christmas Story

We went the other evening to pick out our Christmas tree. It was there, in the lot of pre-cut trees with fake frosting that it dawned on me: Hooper is growing up. And fast. I watched as he weaved in and out of the aisles, hiding quickly behind one tree and then behind the next, popping out every now and again to say “boo” with the sneakiest little smirk on his face. It seems like just yesterday that I was swooning over his pitter patter. Pitter patter; you know, the sound toddlers make when they’re running. Only they don’t run so much as they gallop and they practically lose all self control with each step as if they’re running down hill only there is no hill, only a hallway.
I had Van in the front carrier and my camera, eager to catch every significant and insignificant moment, slung over my shoulder. I called out to Hooper every now and again to remind him that I was close by. Only he didn’t care. He was one amongst the Christmas trees. Every now and again, he’d pop out only run away once again. And I watched as he ran. And there was no pitter patter. Instead there was a well executed stride. Quick, deliberate, coordinated steps in quick succession. He was like an arrow darting away from me. I suppose that is how life will be from this point forward.
Side note: I saw someone on instagram post this quote from Gandhi and it’s been in my head ever since: “You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.”

My thoughts are with everyone in this time of sorrow.

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