Before becoming a mother, I never really kept to a routine. I did what I want, when I wanted, and prided myself on the freedom that came with not owning a home. Life changes people, or so they say, and I’ve had to adapt to prevent from falling on my face in this whole motherhood business.
We, as a family, have had to adapt a lot over the last few months. First with my back surgery, which rendered me completely useless up until just recently (I would now characterize myself as “not as useful as I appear”). And second, with the move. Whatever we knew in terms of a routine beforehand has changed several times.
I read once that children thrive in a routine environment; that they rely on schedule and knowing what to expect. I can see how that may be true for some, but I think it’s more or less a blanket statement and, as with most things in parenting, cannot be applied to all children. Reminds me of this beautiful post by Sash.
I digress.
I got to thinking the other day while I was in the shower. As I reached for the bottle of shampoo, I realized that I have a shower routine; an order to which I shampoo, wash, condition, and shave. I started to question whether I’m as anti-routine as I thought. And then I got to thinking about all the little routines I have, like getting the kids in the car; I do it the same way every time.
Most of our days follow some sort of a schedule. What each slot gets filled with may change from the day to day, but there are slots to fill (the after breakfast slot, the nap time slot, etc). Of course there are days, even weeks, where all caution is thrown to the wind and you better believe these are some of the best days; I love breaks in routine.
I snapped these photos the other day on one of our typical morning outings.
How routine are your days? Do you enjoy throwing caution to the wind or does it make you anxious? How do your kids handle a change or routine or, better yet, a lack of routine all together?
And can we talk about that last picture… brother helping brother, at it’s finest.
We definitely stick to more of a routine every day… I thrive on it, and we’ve discovered that our 2 year old son really does better when we stick to the same routine. That’s not to say that we don’t completely switch things up now and then, but for the most part… routine just works better for us especially since it helps ensure that we all get out the door on time and go to bed on time. Routines and schedules are sort of how I keep my sanity.
I like to have a plan or idea of what we are going to do but we aren’t super strict routine. I dont like open time pockets so I like to fill them up in my mind ahead of time otherwise I get overwhelmed easily. Even if I end up not doing it, just having ideas of what to do with our days helps. I do think our nap/sleep schedule is pretty sold and unmoving but other than that things move around and evolve. My son is only 20 months so we cherish that nap/early bedtime quiet time around here . I like to balance crazy days with calm ones (more of me than anyone else, ha!) But I am starting to realize that having some things in place/routine does help my mind stay clear, and gives me more mental room to think about other things. I also live on lists for the same reason.
Just ask Chris how routine my days are. He says he could set a clock to me. This does not make me sad. I LOVE living with structure. So funny how different we are! We’ve definitely become more alike since you’ve been a mom 😉
Eh, we’ve got a few routines like nap time immediately follows lunch. Literally, she goes from chair at the table to the changing table to the crib. Aaaaaand….she eats breakfast soon after waking up. I’m pretty sure that’s it. I sorta go with the flow each day and gauge our day around when she’ll need a nap (which varies, depending on what time she woke up in the morning and how active of a morning she had). My mom (who has been watching Mia in the afternoons until just recently) has always criticized me for my lack of a solid routine. I just never felt the need. BUT…this all may change because I’ve signed her up for a summer preschool program (MWF, 9am-12pm, for 7 weeks) and today was her first day. It’s probably a good idea to create more of a bedtime routine for her to get her to sleep a little earlier than we have been (around 9:30pm) so she’s up early the next day with enough rest. I’m hoping daycare gives me the time I need to clean and do wifely, motherly , householdly things so that we can go on more outdoor excursions like you and your boys do. I’m totally slacking in that adventurous and exploring department. -Misty
I used to think I was someone who hated routine, but like you it has crept into my life. It still stifles me sometimes, and I get the urge to break it and run free for a short while, but I begin to crave the quiet and the routine once more. I love the set days as much as I love the wild ones, I guess a healthily mix of both works best!
I find freedom in my routine. My boys do really terrible without naps, and when I try and push bedtime back even a little bit all hell breaks loose. So. We wake up early (their choice, not mine, they wake up at the same time everyday no matter what). From there I have a lot of freedom. I hardly ever plan my days ahead of time and we love to have random adventures in our area on a whim. As long as we are home before nap time. 🙂 I don’t feel bound by it, though. It is a season in life and will soon be gone, and as I’m pregnant with my third I usually need a nap too. I have never minded routines, and while I am not super structured I find that sometimes there is more freedom in having a routine than in trying to wing it. At least for me and my family.
I hate routine. My child thrives on it. A break in the routine causes complete chaos in my little man’s emotional state, so I’ve had to adapt. Such is life!
Whatever works! 🙂