A photo journal comprised of my thoughts on motherhood and other life happenings, as well as some of professional work as a photographer. Southern California is home.
1. There ought to be a service available to come by and potty train your kid (as suggested by a kind person on instagram, though really I don’t think anyone other than myself or Willy could actually do the deed — so I guess this is kinda a joke, but not really, because really, it sucks and there’s lots of services for lots of things that people have deemed as shitty-to-have-to-do-themselves… like Molly Maids).
2. Because there is no number one (no pun intended), there ought to be an alcohol and massage distributor that comes and makes deliveries for those suffering through the stab-myself-in-the-eye-out-of-boredom and rub-my-back-and-neck-because-I’ve-been-wiping-a-lot-o’-butt-and-floor-and-toilet-and-hands days of potty training. I guess I should be careful what I ask for, because I think there are a lot of people that are actually in the business of dispensing alcohol and massages, if you know what I mean ::nudge nudge::
I don’t really remember potty training Hooper, to be honest. I know I did it because, again, no number one existed. I also know that I followed some sort of methodology because I recall writing posts on it — posts I would probably benefit from going back and reading.
The actual peeing-in-the-potty part has been going well. The accidents all occurred on the first day and have been seldom since. Well they were seldom and then we had a few days where we were lazy, or went to Disneyland, or just said “screw it” for the sake of our sanity. Since then, there have been more accidents. We’ve ventured out without a diaper on, which feels risky in the same way as leaving the house without a tampon when you know your period is coming feels. And, no accidents in the first week or so. Then we went out to eat and left the restaurant with wet pants after Willy and I both ignored his request to go potty because he had just. went. potty. It’s draining, people, let me tell you.
The hard part, this go-around, has been dealing with a fiercely independent and downright stubborn two year old. Things like insisting that he get on and off the potty by himself, flushing the toilet for even the littlest trickle, flushing the toilet multiple times before the water has even refilled, insisting on playing with the gross plunger or the toilet bowl cleaner, sticking his hand in his urine stream, flexing his “weapon” while his peeing so the urine goes up and out of the toilet, asking why he can’t pee when it’s “big”, pulling all the toilet paper off the toilet paper roll, going potty – getting his reward – then immediately going potty again and asking for another reward (manipulative bastard, I tell ya), and throwing a tantrum because farting on the toilet is not the same as pooping on the toilet and he cannot pick a “special prize” until there is an actual log. Oh ya, and we’ve said goodbye to at least 4 toys that he has dropped in — some intentional, some accidents.
I was prepared for the patience it would take to clean up after a butt-booty-naked toddler running around and was pleasantly surprised when he caught on to where to make the mess relatively fast. But my patience has wavered considerably in dealing with everything else. Like the dump he took on the floor the other morning. Though, arguably, he did make up for it when he requested to hug and kiss the “baby” piece of poop and went on to call it “cuuuuuute”. The video of that has gotten me through some of the more challenging spots during the last few weeks.
Deep breaths and a cold one (or two) for the next few days, weeks, and months. Wish me luck.
15 Responses
Lane is a month or so younger than Van and he’s off school for two weeks so we optimistically decided to tackle the potty business. Day one, success! Days 2-10 WERE 100% FAILS. And not because he doesn’t get it, mind you. He asks to sit on the potty, tells me that’s where all his business belongs, but in the crucial moment when I can tell he’s gonna go and say, “let’s go! Your potty is waiting!” He mischievously smiles at me, runs to a corner and pees – the look in his eyes one of true rebellion through his giggles.
So I mean, at least your little is trying? Mine thinks mommy’s sad face is about as funny as they come!
P.s, we gave up and are going to try in a few months when he bevomes an angel and wants to please me. That stage happens right?
Good Morning America recently did a story on this potty training service in New York: http://www.nycpottytraining.com (It is all kinds of expensive!! Someone is getting paid more in two days than we make in a month to teach a kid to use the potty!)
I’ve potty trained two of my own and one that I babysit. Every kid is SO different. My first was a breeze, and my second (the most strong willed of the two) was harder. With the little guy I babysit, I’ve found he went through phases where he had more accidents a few weeks in, but at that point, we were too far in to say he wasn’t really ready. (He definitely “got” it, but would often get so wrapped up in what he was doing, he’d ignore the “need.”) We just stuck it out and things got better.
Giiiiiiirl, I have nothing wise to say other than, I am right beside you. We are three weeks in to potty training over here and I don’t think I’ve ever been this exhausted. For us, the pee clicked right away, but poop training has been a whole different story. My son’s been constipated on and off for three weeks, which has affected EVERYTHING (his eating, his mood, his naps). It’s awful, and draining, and frustrating, and so. much. work.
But they won’t go to college crapping their pants, ya know? We’ll get this. Xo.
Ya, poop is a whole other thing, isn’t it? I suppose they’ll be poopin’ their pants in college for other reasons. ha. Fist bump from one exhausted mama to another. xo
Oh, potty training… Everyone complains about diapers but we forget about the ridiculous amounts of effort it takes to make even the most willing little people learn the basic skills of independence. My younger one is 5 and just had her first bed accident in months tonight. The end is in sight and it’ll be ok on the other side. Hang in there! A cold beverage, meditation and a good washing machine will help! Your pictures and words bring light and humor even to this one. xx
True story: I was venting my frustrations with potty training (my 3 1/2 year old finally decided he was ready to attempt this) at our mommy and me class (in Boca Raton, Florida which needs to be said for the sake of this story) and all of the moms looked horrified. I was starting to feel badly like my kid was the only one who wouldn’t get it, but then one of the moms asked if I was really potty training him myself. I was very confused. She went on to tell me that there is a lady who comes to your house and potty trains your kids for you or, if they’re really reluctant, you send them to her house.
So there’s that.
Hang in there. I hear you. It is so freaking frustrating!
I hear ya sista! Thank f**k it’s summer here and we have a second toilet outside. Crap in the driveway I can live with. Crap on the kitchen floor is not cool. Good luck!
This made me laugh so hard and made me remember days with my two boys not so long ago. Humour is a powerful weapon and a dear friend but you know that already! Thank you for sharing your wonderful writing and brilliant wit, I so enjoyed reading your words.
I’m convinced of two things: 
Lane is a month or so younger than Van and he’s off school for two weeks so we optimistically decided to tackle the potty business. Day one, success! Days 2-10 WERE 100% FAILS. And not because he doesn’t get it, mind you. He asks to sit on the potty, tells me that’s where all his business belongs, but in the crucial moment when I can tell he’s gonna go and say, “let’s go! Your potty is waiting!” He mischievously smiles at me, runs to a corner and pees – the look in his eyes one of true rebellion through his giggles.
So I mean, at least your little is trying? Mine thinks mommy’s sad face is about as funny as they come!
P.s, we gave up and are going to try in a few months when he bevomes an angel and wants to please me. That stage happens right?
Haha, let me know if that stage ever comes 😉 LOL.
Good Morning America recently did a story on this potty training service in New York: http://www.nycpottytraining.com (It is all kinds of expensive!! Someone is getting paid more in two days than we make in a month to teach a kid to use the potty!)
I’ve potty trained two of my own and one that I babysit. Every kid is SO different. My first was a breeze, and my second (the most strong willed of the two) was harder. With the little guy I babysit, I’ve found he went through phases where he had more accidents a few weeks in, but at that point, we were too far in to say he wasn’t really ready. (He definitely “got” it, but would often get so wrapped up in what he was doing, he’d ignore the “need.”) We just stuck it out and things got better.
Hang in there, mama! You got this. 😉 *HUGS*
Love and light,
Jessica
Aw, thanks. Hugs right back. And thanks for sharing the article, will read it tomorrow! xo
Giiiiiiirl, I have nothing wise to say other than, I am right beside you. We are three weeks in to potty training over here and I don’t think I’ve ever been this exhausted. For us, the pee clicked right away, but poop training has been a whole different story. My son’s been constipated on and off for three weeks, which has affected EVERYTHING (his eating, his mood, his naps). It’s awful, and draining, and frustrating, and so. much. work.
But they won’t go to college crapping their pants, ya know? We’ll get this. Xo.
Ya, poop is a whole other thing, isn’t it? I suppose they’ll be poopin’ their pants in college for other reasons. ha. Fist bump from one exhausted mama to another. xo
Don’t share this post with Chris. He says he’s 60/40 on kids now. He’s very fragile.
hahahahaha tell him I didn’t do any research — the research will make it muuuuuch better ::wink wink::
Oh, potty training… Everyone complains about diapers but we forget about the ridiculous amounts of effort it takes to make even the most willing little people learn the basic skills of independence. My younger one is 5 and just had her first bed accident in months tonight. The end is in sight and it’ll be ok on the other side. Hang in there! A cold beverage, meditation and a good washing machine will help! Your pictures and words bring light and humor even to this one. xx
No kidding. Diapers are where it’s at. xo
True story: I was venting my frustrations with potty training (my 3 1/2 year old finally decided he was ready to attempt this) at our mommy and me class (in Boca Raton, Florida which needs to be said for the sake of this story) and all of the moms looked horrified. I was starting to feel badly like my kid was the only one who wouldn’t get it, but then one of the moms asked if I was really potty training him myself. I was very confused. She went on to tell me that there is a lady who comes to your house and potty trains your kids for you or, if they’re really reluctant, you send them to her house.
So there’s that.
Hang in there. I hear you. It is so freaking frustrating!
No way. That’s nuts. Wonder what she does at her house hahahahaha… You hang in there, too. We got this. xo
I hear ya sista! Thank f**k it’s summer here and we have a second toilet outside. Crap in the driveway I can live with. Crap on the kitchen floor is not cool. Good luck!
Haha. Long live summer.
This made me laugh so hard and made me remember days with my two boys not so long ago. Humour is a powerful weapon and a dear friend but you know that already! Thank you for sharing your wonderful writing and brilliant wit, I so enjoyed reading your words.