My therapist pulled from this story during a couples session many months ago and it’s stuck with me ever since; she used it to speak of happiness within versus happiness based on external circumstances. Saving it here for myself, really. But maybe someone out there could use it too. And if you’re in Orange County and need a recommendation for a therapist, do check in with me. She’s everything. Here’s the story…

There’s an old story of a simple country fellow who had to go to the big market town for the first time. He had managed to remain all his life in the little village where everyone knew him and where he knew most everyone. Now, something else was demanded of him and he had to step out into the wide world. He had heard travelers tell of the hordes of people and the rush of activities in the market city; he feared that he would become lost amidst so many people. So, he went to seek advice from a friend who was more experienced than himself. He blurted out his questions along with his fears. “When I go to the city I will have to stay in one of those big inns where all the workers and travelers stay in the same room. I will have to sleep in a room full of strangers. I have never done that before and I am afraid that I will become lost and confused. I will know myself when I lay down to sleep; but amongst all those people, how will I know which one I am when I wake up?” His friend saw a chance to play a trick on him, as people often do when someone indulges in their innocence or foolishness. The friend advised him to first go to the market and buy a large and colorful watermelon. He instructed him that before going to sleep he must tie the watermelon to his ankle. After that, he should take his rest. The friend went on to explain that in the morning when he woke in the company of strangers, he would be the one with the watermelon tied to his foot. The foolish fellow thought for a while, then asked: “What if during the dark of night someone unties the watermelon from my foot and ties it onto theirs? How will I know which one I am if the watermelon has been switched?” At that point, his friend was wise enough to become silent on the subject.

It’s a simple story of a simple-minded fellow, yet more and more people seem to depend on a watermelon, or a degree, or a certain home address or prestigious title for proof that they are in fact an individual and someone of worth and value. Ironically, more and more people fear becoming victims of “identity theft;” as if the watermelon approach is taking precedence over the sense of a true identity that is seeded in the soul. The statistical view of the world, the massing of people and the obsession with appearances makes the dilemma of the country fellow an increasingly common experience. Modern ideas tend to follow the fears and concerns of the fellow whose identity is but an appendage to his life. Either the presence of a unique soul is considered impossible to prove and therefore not to be believed or else the soul is deemed a blank slate to be conditioned by one’s life circumstances. If our identity has been determined by other people and by forces outside ourselves; then our sense of self will be like a colorful item that we purchase in the world-wide market and tie onto our bodies. If our identity in this world can become nothing but an appendage to be manipulated and adapted to outer circumstances, we are in increasing danger of losing it or having it taken from us. In forgetting how the soul is seeded to begin with we can be in danger of becoming completely lost in this world, both empty within and completely disoriented as well. Without a genuine sense of an inner life and deeper self we become increasingly subject to those who cleverly manipulate the marketplace as well as the elements of politics and even the premises and promises of religion.

Meade, Michael. Fate and Destiny, the Two Agreements of the Soul (Kindle Locations 1193-1201). GreenFire Press. Kindle Edition.